A dad's worst fear

Dear JJ,

Yesterday a gunman went into an elementary school and killed 20 children, ages 6 and 7 years old. It was a horrible act of violence.

While many people are using this to discuss the politics of change with guns, or what it means for the mental health of our society, for me it means I can't always keep you safe. The first day you were born your mom and I were up all night just watching you sleep, and smiling at each other - but we were really keeping watch. Today I found a bookshelf that we will secure to the wall, after you started to climb it. When you discovered you could go through the doggie door, it was yet another place that we had to watch out for you.

The hard part about being an older parent is I know I am mortal.  But when I hear about children dying, it reminds me - you are mortal too. So I'm going to enjoy every minute we have together. Sorry if I hug you extra tight sometimes, and if I want more kisses - but you don't seem to mind.

Love,

Dad

Noodles for my boy

You should be comfortable when you sleep

A happy boy - 

These are my favorite moments

We survived

Dear JJ,

Your mom had to go away for four days on business - well, she went to Park City, Utah - but I'm certain it was business.

So for four days you and I were together. I have to admit- I was pretty worried about it. I cancelled some clinic days, and hoped that you wouldn't be upset that your mom was gone. I kept trying to find friends who would come and help- but turns out we didn't need it.

Discovered you tossed the Xmas balls off the tree so we threw them in the pool and filled the tree with stuffed animals and action figures. Now you leave it alone

But we survived it- not only survived it, but we had a lot of fun. We had put up a tree for the holidays, but you kept pulling the shiny ornaments off and breaking them. So we took them all off- tossed them into the pool, and filled it with stuffed animals and action figures.

Every now and then you would ask about "mommy," and when I told you she was at work you were fine. Although, if you knew her work was in Park City --- but that is another story.

I never was so happy to see your mom back. You are a lucky young man- you have a mom that loves taking care of you, and you of her. But for four days we were two bachelors - changing the X-mas tree, and making our new traditions -- and it was cool

love,

Dad

Our X-mas pool -tossing the ornaments in

Doggie Door and being 2

Dear JJ,

When you were a few months old the doggie door fascinated you. A few months ago you began to tease Lucky by putting his toys out the doggie door.

Then you discovered - yes, you could go through it.

Two year olds- lots of energy. Lots of exploring. We love it

Love,

I saw this and said- uh oh

Then I saw this

Almost in like a plumber

Uh oh

Now what?

Dad

Your first trike

Your love it - from the moment you saw it

You don't have to push it son

Playing outside, rougher on grass

A nice place to relax with a bottle and your blanket

Really, the bell - it works

Dear JJ,

Your mom and I were excited to get your first vehicle! A trike. You took to it immediately, and we even have a little bar on the back where we can push and steer you around the neighborhood.

There are a lot of new things that come into people's lives - and sometimes people think it is the joy of obtaining things that is the secret to happiness. But for you it isn't a possession- it was just joy- a way to move around, a new sensation, and fun. 

We love seeing your joy - because that brings us joy.

Love, 

Dad

Kitchen Help

Dear JJ,

For months you have been sitting in your high chair, watching daddy cook. When I would fix something you would look at me season a chicken, or bread some veal, or Sous Vide some steak. Then we got you some play dough. You love it- sort of. So, decided to try your hand in the kitchen.
You love "help daddy cook."
Your mom said, "he isn't growing up to be a chef," to which I responded, he will grow up to be a cook.
Of course we don't know what you will grow up to be. But you like helping dad in the kitchen - and I like having you there. We will let the future take care of that.
Until then - pass the salt.

Love,
Dad

Its for me, not you

Dear JJ,

Apparently most 2 year olds have bad dreams, and don't sleep well. You are not the exception. You wake up, and nothing better than mom or dad comforting you. We come into your room, get a bit of milk for you, and lay down until you drift off to sleep. 

A patient of mine died - suddenly, unexpectedly, and I couldn't sleep. When I heard you cry and came to your room with a bit of milk and lay down, you put your hand on me and patted me on the chest as if to say "its ok daddy." I slept well after that. Sometimes we need comfort too. Thank you JJ

Love Dad

NOODLES

Do I extend my pinkie?

Coffee is a morning ritual now

Your favorite place to travel- with mom

When you look down at the trucks, cars, buses

The Crib

Dear JJ,

The crib is gone- and in its place is a regular bed - a twin bed.
What I like is that now I can lay down with you and tell you stories or sing as you go to sleep. It makes bedtime a lot easier. Before you would fall asleep in the big chair and we would have to put you into this crib. But now the crib is gone.
I've loved every minute of you. Some say that time just goes by too fast - and maybe it does. I'm just glad for every minute that I get to watch you grow.
Bye Bye Crib-

Love, Dad

You call yourself Doctor JJ

Your favorite dish - Pasta

A bear invaded Phoenix Country Club- your first trick or treat

You and your beautiful mom in San Francisco 

But no matter what- always good to get home and see Lucky

Mom

Dear JJ,

When I look back at old photographs of my parents, I see this young, happy couple who clearly loved each other very much. My parents very attractive in their day- but even more than that, were well suited - and we just got to help them celebrate their 64th anniversary together.

Like my parents, I am lucky.  Your mom, besides being a beautiful lady in looks, is a wonderful person on the inside, is bright, and one of the more caring persons I know. Not only lucky because of having a companion that suits me well, but lucky because of her we have you- a beautiful son.

Sometimes I don't let her know enough.

Someday I wish for you what I have, what my parents have- a companion that is well suited for you.

Love Dad

JJ in Alaska

That is one large cow

We said antelope not cantaloupe  

Sticks - why do we buy toys?

OK, you say, lets get this ship moving

My favorite time, anytime with you

Nothing like Gig to rest while on a long train ride

Another pine cone

You love pine cones and sticks

Fox Island - where Rockwell Kent became inspired. He was with his son, I am with mine 

Sometimes a long day on a boat is rough

These lions don't roar

You with Gigi - watching for whales

You and mom on the train in Alaska

These fellows came out just to see you

Your favorite bedtime song is "A whale of a tail" and here is the whale

Dear JJ,

Being an Alaskan dad means I get to take you to Alaska.  This time we got to go with Gigi. But now that you are two it means I buy your airline seat- so how much will that slow us down -- well, not too much. 

I have done a lot of travel in my life - but now the travel is fun. Seeing the world through your eyes opens up mine.  Every now and then I go on a trip without you and mom, and that just seems empty.

So- we are a family, or as I like to say "Team Simpson."

Love,

Dad

Bye Butterfly

Dear JJ,

You found a little butterfly, and played with it for a while.  But as the butterfly would move you were a bit rough - so I had to catch the butterfly and let it go.

You cried and cried, as I told you the butterfly went to the moon. But then you looked up at the moon and said, "Bye butterfly."

Our time is short son- and everyday when I go to work and you say "Bye daddy," my heart melts - and I hope that it is soon I get to see you again.  One day I won't- and it will be like the butterfly. But until then we will play a lot, and I hold precious every hug and kiss.

Love,

Dad

Looking for butterflies at St. James Park in London

Did you know you have a beautiful mom?

You have become quite able to play with your iPod games

Fans fascinate you

Having Gigi give you a bath is the best

I value every hug and kiss 

Nothing like greens

Chasing seagulls in La Jolla